Sotto voce
by AzzyDarling
Summary: Learning to let sleeping dogs - die. follow-up to TRUST
1. Chapter 1

AN; This is the "sequel" to Trust, I can however not really say if this might be a longer story, i think it might be... Thing is that i really liked the set in Trust, and so decided to work more on it, and it did turn out a rather lenghty storyline. This chapter is not betaed mostly so i could get it out fast, i didn't want to let lj user="elphabachan" feel like she was talking to herself in lj comm="nickxellis" ;) And is written for lj user="erestorjunkie" as a SUPER belated b-day pressie.

* * *

><p><em>Run fast for your mother, run fast for your father<em>

_Run for your children, for your sisters and brothers_

_Leave all your love and your longing behind_

_You can't carry it with you if you want to survive_

_The dog days are over_

_The dog days are done_

_The horses are coming_

_So you better run_

_Florence + the machine._

**Part 1 - So you better run!**

As Nick closed the door to the other safety room, he just stood there all numb. He leaned forward, resting his hands on his knees and just listened to his own breath. At least he had made it over the park, and somehow found his way through the ruined streets to this safe room. He waited for his panicked breathing to slow down, he looked up to access the room, it was small, damp and down right disgusting, and he could almost hear Rochelle bitch about it. God he missed her, and Coach too even if he was a rock of ignorance. Ellis was wrong, he had not wanted to see any of them die, he 'did' care. But ultimately he cared about his own ass more, where was the crime in that?

Nick pushed off the door and tossed his bloody rifle on a filthy mattress, before he started to roam though the cabinets for something edible. He found some cans with no label, and figured he just had to chance it, it could be canned beef or something, but to his demise it was green peas. "Dammit!" He mumbled, but none the less raised the can to his mouth and ate it greedily. Beggars can't be choosers he heard Ellis say in his head. There had been a time where he would have laughed at the stupid hick, because nothing was further from the truth if you lacked any shape and form of ethics. If you 'really' wanted to, you could get just about anything you wanted, with a minimum stake. But that was back when there still was a society to navigate in. He hated this shit, he had never even wanted to go camping as a kid, and here he was sleeping on filthy mattresses, eating food straight from a can. He tossed the can to the other side of the room. "Here Ro, see if anyone comes along to pick that shit up." He said to himself, feeling like his voice was too loud in the silent room.

He woke with a massive headache, and an ache in his bones. He was tired, but then again he had been tired for a month straight, because even if he slept, he never really slept, not for real. Nick groaned as he got up, searching the room for anything that would wake him a little more, he could hear the birds outside, so it was morning, at least he didn't have to lay down and try to sleep again. He smiled wide as he found some instant coffee, not that it was a miracle in it self, but right now he could not have asked for more. Quickly he turned around and picked up the electrical kettle, hoping that it still worked. The power was still on, so hopefully it would boil water. He plugged it in and waited patiently, letting a breath out he didn't know he had been holding, when he heard the tell tale sound of water boiling inside the plastic container. "Thank you God!" He whispered. And within minutes he was seated with his coffee, his legs on the table, he stared out of the opening of the safe room door, the skies was blue, and the birds were acting like it was spring. If he closed his eyes, he could imagine it was any morning, any other morning from before this clusterfuck. With a peaceful smile he closed his eyes, only to see the snarling face of Phyllis, he opened his eyes again instantly. Why the fuck did his ex-wife have to ruin this moment? Maybe like she had ruined every other moment..

Nick took a sip of the warm coffee, being alone sucked, he liked to tell people he had always been alone, but that was not really true, he had always been the only one with his agenda, surrounded by people. Always single, but never alone. And he wasn't sure how he liked this whole 'alone' thing. He had cracked bitter jokes about Phyllis to his friends all the way from Savannah, but truth was that she had left him, and the reason he hated her so, was because she had absolutely broken his heart. He had been slick, he had been confident, and they had been a team, Phyllis and he. They could take on anyone, hells he was sure they could have conned Donald Trump out of every dime if they had wanted to. That was until.. Nick's lips was a straight line of anger. Until Morgan had come along, and he had ended up as the one on the receiving end of the con.

What he had never admitted to anyone ever, was that he had trusted Phyllis, and had not seen it coming, she had not only broken his heart, but she had crushed his ego completely. So while Phyllis and Morgan had been on a plane to Cuba, he had been playing black jack in state county. He would never ever forgive either of them for that, well Morgan was an idiot, but Phyllis, she had known exactly what she had done. He sipped his cooling coffee, She had served him divorce papers and a stupid postcard through a lawyer while he was still on the inside. He had just signed it in anger. Sometimes he wish he hadn't. And sometimes he wished that pigs would fly, or that he would meet either those asshats as zombies so he could shoot them limb from limb. He had memorized the postcard, not sure why, but he still recalled the note scribbled down. 'So long cowboy, SunTrust 23467 Leslie Frank. - Ph.'

And that was why he had come to that stupid town of Savannah, the SunTrust bank, it had taken him a good while to figure out, but eventually the dime dropped. The bankbox had contained 15.000 dollars and her wedding ring. He had not even gambled those money away, he had used them for hookers, trying to fuck away his anger. And that was where the end of world had found him, in a hotel the morning after kicking some skank out of his room. He had welcomed it then, he was being eaten up inside out by hate, anger and bitterness. When the world gave him an opportunity to kill everything around him, he wasn't gonna argue.

Nick looked over at the kettle, he could do with a cup more, and then he would go. He got up and clicked it on again, and then pulled off his shirt and jacket, both smelled absolutely putrid, but it was not like there was anyone around to complaint, and had there been, then they would probably have had the same stench. Nick looked up and down his arms for scratches. He found a deep angry bite on his upper arm, but he just dressed it humming to himself. Somehow the silence and only his own thoughts to keep him company was already getting to him. He even missed Ellis' stupid chatter about his inbred buds.

He pulled his shirt on again, and made himself a second cup of coffee, he hate to admit to himself that he didn't know if he would ever get one again, and if, when. Funny how you tried to file away fleeting stuff like the taste of warm coffee, just in case. He hardly thought that his last thought on this earth would be of coffee.

Ellis snuck out of his safe room stocked up on whatever he could carry, he was terribly conflicted between finding Nick, and just making a run for it. He sighed and rested his forehead against the sniper scope of his rifle. Nick won out, he had to find Nick, he had to know if he was even still alive, or if he had sent Nick to his death. He felt a terrible gap inside, he felt like he had misjudged Nick after all, he 'had' saved his ass more than once, and had unselfishly shared of ammo and bandages. Maybe that whole thing with Coach was just the drop that made the glass overflow, it was not as much as the act itself, it was the terror in knowing they had all transformed into something else than they were before, in just a month. Nick was a deuce no doubt about it, but Ellis didn't think he'd go around chopping people's heads off. And maybe it was his own reaction that scared him so, that he was secretly happy that he didn't have to deal with zombie-Coach. And he had taken that out on Nick, and called him a monster.

He bit his lip and looked over the park in the scope, searching for Nick's body, increasingly thrilled when he didn't find it. But he 'had' used him for witch bait right? If that wasn't fuckitry Ellis didn't know what was. But Nick had been right hadn't he? It's not like Ellis would have done it if he had asked him, and it had worked like a charm. Then why had he been so angry? Because he was tired of being Nick's whipping-boy, he was fed up with the jokes, the cruel hints, and the downright nasty comments. Rochelle had told him not to take it to heart, bless her. In that way Rochelle had reminded him of his mother, always reminding him that the right thing is to forgive and forget, otherwise your spirit can't grow. He let the rifle fall to his knee, he didn't find Nick's corpse, or worse, a zombie-Nick, this he hoped would mean that Nick had made it. There was only one other way around the park, the one he had told Nick to take, and that was the way he would go.

He jumped off the brick wall around the park, and started walking north-east to make it around the roadblock, shooting the few zombies that seemed to be alerted to his pretense.

Nick had left, but not without picking up a fat marker someone had left and written 'FUCK YOU PHYLLIS' on the wall. It made him feel ridiculous, happy and childish all in all. He scanned the area, wishing he had found more food, the coffee had woken him, but it had also just made him a little light headed.

He had no clue as to how many times he had turned and twisted in this stupid city, "Why the fuck couldn't she have left me that box in Vegas?" He mumbled to himself, "Oh no, she had to chose somewhere that has 'cousins only' day at the clubs." He sighed, and shot a zombie without even registering what he was doing. "Could have been worse i suppose." He said, smiling at another walking corpse that came against him, "Could have been Idaho." He pulled the trigger and watched the zombie fall, "That's what you get for looking like my 3 grade teacher, you bitch." He laughed, stepping over the dead zombie. He walked a few blocks seeing remarkably few zombies, he hummed to himself in lack of Ellis' chatter to drive the ever constant 'buzz' of the zombies away... He saw an open door and went in, shooting a zombie that just sat aimlessly on the floor.

iWell I can tell by the way that you twitch and walk

See by the way that you baby talk

Know by the way that you treat your man

I can love you, baby, till the niiiight train

I don't want you wash my clothes.../i

Hearing a noise, Nick shut up instantly. He twirled around, "Ellis?" He asked, knowing that it was a stupid question. No answer came, and no more noise either, must have been a critter of some kind, it would make sense that rats and other scavengers came up to eat whatever they could. "Carry on." He grinned, and turned to the cabinets again.

iI don't want you leave the home

I don't want 'cause I'm sad and blue

I just want to make love to you, baby

Love to you, baby

Love to you, baby

Love to you

Yeah/i

He snapped his fingers to keep the rhythm, funny really, he was never into the Stones, and the only song he could think of, come the end of days, was a song by those wankers. He shook his head amused and carried on singing.

Ellis touched the kettle that Nick had used earlier, it was still lukewarm, so unless there were other survivors in New Orleans, it had to be Nick who had used it, and this also meant that he had been here. But where had he gone? Ellis stepped outside in the sun again, He looked around and saw a dead zombie, shot in the head. Maybe he should just follow the dead zombies, that would lead him to Nick. He shrugged at his own stupid plan, but found that he had none better, so he might as well just go with this one. And so he walked in the direction of the cadaver, looking out for more gunshot casualties.

Not far from the door where Nick had gone into the house, Ellis stopped and listened. He heard a deep rumble, he knew what that meant. "Nick?" He called, "NICK!"

On the other side of the house, Nick was going through some poor sods garden shed, looking for stuff to kill zombies in creative ways, because he was almost out of bullets. He heard a vague sound, was that someone calling or was he nuts? Nah he hadn't been on his own for long enough to start hearing shit. He came out of the gardenshed, and he heard it again. It was most definitely someone calling. "Ellis?" He called back, getting the attention of a lonely zombie, which he just pushed away, before he ran back into the house. "ELLIS?" He called. Nick stopped in the door, the cry for Ellis died on his lips as he saw the young man on a first store balcony, clearly torn between fleeing without breaking a limb from the drop, or letting the Tank crush him, he stared at the ground under him desperately scanning for a bush or something to break his fall, but there was nothing but concrete pavement.

Nick just stood and watched in dawning horror as the tank swatted cars out of his way, and picked up a slab of concrete throwing it in blind fury. Ellis ducked from the flying stone, but as it hit the balcony with eerie precision, Ellis had to hold on to the iron wrought fence not to fall off. And even if Nick was not close enough, he knew how scared Ellis was, like he could smell his fear from here.

And this was when Nick did something he never thought he would. He stood out in the middle of the street and waved his arms, "HERE! I'M RIGHT HERE!" He yelled, "THAT'S RIGHT YOU BIG FUCKER, COME AND GET IT!" He paled as the Tank turned it's attention to him. He took aim and shot the giant zombie in the head a couple of times. Nick whimpered as a car hit close by, tossed by the Tank, but then he turned and ran, he ran for dear life, and Ellis' dear life too. "SHOOT IT! SHOOT THE SHIT OUT OF THAT THING!" he screamed, his voice breaking because he had to sprint from the roaring predator.

Ellis aimed and shot, emptied a clip completely into that monster, but it didn't as much as blink. Fire! I must find some fire! He thought to himself. He spun around like it was gonna help any, and a Molotov or something would magically appear at his feet. "Shit!" He whined, and took a deep breath jumping from the balcony. "Ow fuck!" He cried as he heard a sickly cracking sound, like when you snap a twig, seconds before a white hot pain shot up his leg. He could hear the Tank and knew that Nick was fighting it, hearing gun shots echoing in the streets, Nick had sacrificed himself, God he had been all wrong! "I'm coming!" He said, shuffling to get on his feet, "Hang in there Nick, I'm coming!" He finally got on his feet, and realised to his horror that the rumble was gone, but so was the gunfire, had he killed it, or? Gritting his teeth he limped down the street, clammy hands had a too tight hold of his half empty rifle, and the pain brought tears to his eyes. "NICK!" He screamed, "SAY SOMETHING!"


	2. Chapter 2

_The moment we believe that we have never met_

_Another kind of love it's easy to forget_

_When we are all alone then we do both agree_

_We have a thing in common this was meant to be_

_I raise my hands to heaven of curiosity_

_I don't know what to ask for_

_What has it got for me?_

_The others say we're hiding_

_It's as forward as can be_

_Some things I do for money_

_Some things I do for free_

_-The Knife._

**Part II – I wanted to walk a trail with no end in sight.**

* * *

><p>Nick blinked confused, trying to focus on his surroundings, but no matter how much he tried, everything was blurry still. "Ellis?" He croaked, closing his eyes. 'wiggle your toes' he told himself mentally, and tried with all his might to feel his feet, horror crept up on him, until he had a full blown panic attack! He couldn't feel his fucking feet! "ELLIS!" He screamed, attracting some lazy searching zombies.<p>

Ellis heard that scream, and while it sounded like he was being skinned alive, it was still a proof that the Tank hadn't killed him. "HOLD ON!" Ellis yelled. He stopped and looked around, the sound echoed off the buildings in the street, and he had no way of knowing where Nick was, and he didn't want Nick to make too much noise if he was incapacitated, and couldn't fight off a predator. "Oh God, oh God..." He mumbled, "Where are you?"

Not that Nick could recall when he had last felt like crying, not like he did right in this moment. He took some deep breaths of air, trying to calm his panic, he wiggled his fingers, and moved his arms. Good! Then he hadn't broken his neck when the Tank had swatted him into the wall. It had been luck in disguise though, because he had landed between two buildings where the Tank couldn't get to him. But judging from the smell he wasn't the only thing deadish in here. He lifted himself up on his elbows to see what was wrong with his legs, he couldn't see anything wrong, not like his legs were twisted all wrong, or better yet his entire lower body had been torn off, and he just hadn't realised it yet because the body had gone in to shock. He HAD read about something like that once, about this dude who had walked like across a state with his arm missing from a car crash, just pushing forward on adrenaline. Nick lowered down again, he must have crushed his spine then. "Fuck!" He hissed to himself. Even if Ellis should manage to find him, he couldn't fucking move him. Guess it was game over then, not that he had imagined it like this, handicapped between rotting corpses and garbage. Or maybe then again it didn't sound that off, come to think about it. "ELLIS!" He yelled again, and this time the female zombie at the end of the alley noticed him. She snarled and walked towards him, like she was trying to find his scent amongst all the death. Nick pulled the clip from the AK only to realise that it was empty. So he tossed it, and reached for his belt, grabbing his gun, he pulled that clip to find that he had six bullets, which was more than he had hoped for. He had bullets in his pocket, but he wasn't sure it was the right kind.

Ellis heard the yell and the shot. And several scenarios ran through his head, had Nick shot himself? Was there zombies trying to get to him? Was it a hunter? Or something worse? None of those calmed him at all. He walked into something he thought would have maybe been a hotel, and made his way through the industrial kitchen. "Nick?" He whispered. "You here?" - No Answer.

The shot alerted the zombies that had not been aware of him before this, and they all turned and looked in Nick's direction. And to Nick's horror he heard a high pitched screech. "ELLIS!" He screamed most undignified, but right now he didn't care about keeping his cool.

The hunter's screech and Nick's scream didn't go unnoticed by Ellis, who stood in a diner, spinning around helplessly, trying to determine where the sound came from. In a last desperate attempt he closed his eyes to see if he could home in on the sound. He could hear the zombies growl like they were talking, just searching in blind for something they weren't sure what was, with hungry mouths and grabbing hands. He could hear birds which amused him. And then he heard the hunter again, he frowned, taking a step to the left, grabbing his rifle so hard his knuckles turned white. And he was in luck, the hunter screeched again. Not giving it a second thought Ellis just snapped his eyes open, and bolted out the diner, turning the corner so fast he almost tripped over his own feet, skidding in the gravel on the concrete. "NICK!" He finally cried loud. Turning the corner he saw the hunter, crouching getting ready to jump his victim, and out of the corner of his eye he saw something white'ish on the ground, and something that flew through the air, as it hit the hunters head and fell to the ground; it was a gun. Ellis aimed and was about to shoot when something grabbed him from behind, and for a split second he was sure it was a smoker, and that they both were doomed because he had not bothered to check his surroundings. But as he turned he found it was just some infected, clutching him. He pushed them off and shot them swiftly.

Nick hear the shots close by, and sighed. He had no option left than to try and make his way back into the alley, he had confused the hunter momentarily by the empty gun thrown to it's forehead. Nick panic crawled on his back and elbows backwards, knowing that the hunter would remember what it was doing in a moment. The hunter shook his head, and stared directly at Nick again, growling.

Ellis had to reload, and one of the infected still had a hold of his arm. "HANG ON!" He yelled, fighting to get a clip into his rifle. It happened so fast that he didn't have a chance to react, Ellis had been so focused on Nick, the hunter and his damn clip, that he hadn't heard the boomer on the roof. It dropped down in front of him, and emptied it's bile all over him. "No!" Ellis wailed, finally forcing the clip into the rifle, and shoot the boomer, only earning him a second wave of bile.

It was with grim realizations that Nick had to acknowledge that he wouldn't be able to hide from the hunter, so in a last desperate act he searched the garbage with a blind hand, hoping to find something. His fingers found something cold and hard, he pulled it and to his relief it was a piece of iron pipe, maybe some other survivor had lost the fight here, and dropped it. He held the pipe up against his chest, just in time, as the hunter jumped.

Ellis managed to kick off the horde, and run into the alley, for a second he thought that he was too late, seeing the hunter on top of the white clad heap in the garbage. A second later he registered that the hunter was silent, and not yipping, frothing as it ripped Nick to shreds. He ignored the horde he knew was on his track, and ran directly to Nick and the dead hunter. "Nick?" He asked, kicking the dead hunter off his companion.

Nick drew a deep breath and opened his eyes, "What the fuck took you so long? You stupid ass hick!" He growled, but a little smile twisted on his lips.

Ellis held his hand out to Nick to help him stand, but to his surprise Nick just shook his head. "I can't." He admitted. "What the hell do you mean, you can't?" Ellis asked slightly panicked, not having time for the answer before he had to shoot some zombies in the alley. "We gotta go, man." He begged.

"I know." Nick sighed, "Listen Ellis.." He gestured for Ellis to come to his level, kneeling next to him. "I don't know what that tank did, but i can't feel my fucking legs." He said looking up at Ellis. And for a long moment Ellis didn't answer. He just looked at Nick, looked into the gamblers green eyes, he could see a silent plea there, something he had never seen before. The normally hard eyes, was soft and begging. Nick was too afraid to ask, or maybe he just didn't know how. But Ellis could see how afraid Nick was, he wasn't sure if he was afraid that Ellis would leave him here to his own demise or if he was afraid of death in general, but one thing was sure, Nick was scared out of his wits, and needed his help. Ellis smiled, "I'm not leaving you like this." He said, handing Nick his rifle, "You shoot." He said, moving behind Nick to pull him under the arms, like he had seen in movies, but a grown man's dead weight just seemed really encumbersome, and Ellis ended up having to give up a couple of meters later. At least he had managed to move them into a little secluded corner, Ellis squeezed down between the brick wall and Nick. "Sorry." Ellis panted, leaning his head against the wall. And to his surprise Nick leaned against him, resting his head on Ellis' shoulder.

"You tried, that is more than what i had expected." Nick admitted. And to his surprise, Ellis wrapped an arm around his waist, holding him close up against him. Nick closed his eyes and just listened to Ellis' breathing slowing down to normal, feeling the hot sweaty body against him. And he couldn't remember a time where he had felt more safe, no matter how ridiculous it might sound. Not even his mother, that bitch, had ever made him feel this comfortable in her arms. "I'm sorry." Nick whispered with a tiny voice.

"I know." Ellis whispered back.

Nick waited for a moment, waited for Ellis to tell him that he could keep the rifle, and hold them off for as long as he could, and good luck. But Ellis didn't move, he just sat behind him, holding him tight, breathing. As they both heard some zombies that had made their way down the alley, Ellis' grasp tightened as Nick aimed the rifle as best he could. It was in this moment Nick realised that Ellis wasn't going anywhere. He was going to sit here in a corner on a garbage heap, facing whatever fate. Nick shot the two zombies, and for a little while listened for others, but they didn't come. So he lowered the gun and rested his head back on Ellis' shoulder again, closing his eyes. He couldn't help but to feel humbled. Would he have done the same for Ellis? Or would he have left him? He knew the answer even if he didn't want to hear it, not even from his own heart. He would have left the kid in the blink of an eye, odds are he wouldn't even have searched for him, like Ellis had done for him. He could almost hear Phyllis laugh at him, ending his days here, unable to movie, teary eyed in the arms of some random hick, on their throne of garbage. It was so fucked it was poetic. And yet he never felt more at peace.

TBC


	3. Chapter 3

Title; Sotto voce  
>author;azzy<br>pairring; Nick/Ellis  
>Fandom; L4D2<br>Rating; M/T+  
>WIP; 3?  
>Warnings; blood, angst, craziness, language<br>summary; Sacrifice comes in many shapes and forms.  
>AN; This is the "sequel" to Trust, I can however not really say if this might be a longer story, i think it might be…<p>

_Kiss me, I'm dying  
>Put your hand on my skin<br>I close my eyes  
>I need to have your protection<br>I close my eyes  
>I close your eyes <em>

_-Madonna._

_Chapter 3 - Touch me, I'm trying. _

It had been a while since they had heard any scuffling from a zombie, you could hear them all the time, like a sick buzz in the background, but there was no one close. Nick looked up into the dark, starry skies. He could feel Ellis breathing slowly, his chest rising and falling against Nick's back. Every now and then Nick tried to will his toes to wiggle inside his shoes, but nothing happened. And he had to consider the very real possibility that it was a permanent condition. "Ellis?" He whispered. "Are you sleeping?"

"No." Ellis answered, his breath never changing pace, as he spoke.

"I think they forgot about us." Nick whispered.

"Who the zombies?" Ellis asked with a little smile on his lips, that Nick couldn't see.

"Yeah."

Ellis closed his eyes, relaxing, "I think so too."

Nick bit his lip, "You should go." He said, not really believing that these words even passed his lips.

"Quit it Nick, I ain't leaving you behind." Ellis whispered, sounding mostly like he was falling asleep.

Nick frowned, "Stop being an idiot. If you stay here you will die." He paused and sighed, "You still.."

"I'm dead anyway." Ellis said sadly, "I can't make it on my own, besides, it's my choice to stay here. Figured that since we're gonna die, we might as well do it together." Ellis' voice sounded strangled and hollow, "I'd hate to be alone, when... when.. you know."

Nick nodded, he knew exactly what Ellis meant, he really didn't want to be left behind either, but he felt like he took something dear from Ellis, even if he knew that it was Ellis choice. "If I were dead, you would move, right?"

"Don't even say that." Ellis stated angrily, "I won't hear it. It was just as much my fault as yours that we are sitting here, stop treating me like i don't know what i am doing."

Slowly raising the rifle Nick stared at it hypnotized, "Maybe, maybe this isn't such a bad idea, i mean it beats waiting for those fuckers to come tear me apart."

"Nick" Ellis said softly, "It's a sin."

"But of course." Nick put down the rifle again, "What was i thinking?" Ellis couldn't see him roll his eyes, "Whatever we do, i can't stand sitting here waiting." Nick said sourly.

"Maybe i could go see if i can find something that can get us out of here, like a wheelchair." Ellis said, "I think i saw a one a little back, if i can get that, would you promise me to try?"

Nick was silent for a while, just staring up into the sky. "Yeah, i promise." He said, the lie scorched his lips, but he didn't mind, it would not be the first time he had lied, neither the first time he had lied to people who depended on him keeping his word. "Scouts honor."

"You were totally never a scout." Ellis huffed.

"Sure I was." Nick snickered, leaning forward as Ellis pushed to get out from between Nick and the wall. They had been sitting like this for so long that it felt strange without the softness behind him. Like it felt more real without Ellis to sit here and warm him.

"Give me the rifle." Ellis said, holding his hand out for the AK.

"Afraid i will do myself in?" Nick asked, eyebrow arched in slight amusement.

"No." Ellis lied, shifting his feet slightly. "But you are hidden here, I will need the rifle."

Nick eyed Ellis and then finally handed the younger man the rifle. Ellis looked in thought for a moment, "Nick?" He asked, "There is a chance i am not coming back, so maybe it would be better if you had the rifle after all." He held it out again, to hand it to Nick.

"Ellis, just take the damn rifle. And get going before i die of old age." Nick said closing his eyes, feeling tired.

Ellis squatted down, and looked directly at Nick, he looked like he was about to say something, but then decided against it. "Be safe, okay?" Ellis said.

Nick nodded, leaning against the brick wall, watching Ellis' back as he slowly made his way out of the alley.

Ellis held on to the rifle, scanning the area, if Nick though he was the only liar, he was wrong, Ellis hadn't seen a wheelchair anywhere, but that was not the same as he wasn't sure there had to be one around, all he had to do was to look for one. He slowly crept along the wall of a town house, seeing a sign for the bus terminal. That was a good a shot as any.

"You should have kissed him, you idiot." Ellis whispered to himself, turning the corner to the terminal, "you should've." He peeked into the darkness, he had been lucky so far, no zombie being alerted to his presence. Ellis knew there was a very good chance that Nick would have been very, very angry with him. But it was something Ellis had wanted to do for himself. Funny really, seeing as Nick had been a perfect jerk all the way through, ever since they met in the hotel. But that didn't change the fact, that it had slowly rooted inside Ellis, till he couldn't ignore it anymore. No one knew, no one, not even Nick. Ellis was used to that, admiring from afar. "you're an idiot" He scolded himself in a breath of a whisper, as he walked through the double doors to the terminal, keeping his eyes out for a wheelchair.

And once again he was in luck, there was a wheelchair, smack in the middle of the waiting area of the Bus terminal. Ellis approached it wearily, wondering when his luck would run out. But he heard no special infected in close range. It was not until he grabbed the wheelchair that he realised his luck had not just run out, he had just decreased his chances of survival with 50 percent. The wheelchair was heavy, but also it made a loud screeching noise, that was bound to alert anything within two clicks of the terminal.

"Shit!" He swore, and decided he would just have to do this in turns, run and shoot. First of all he would try and get as far away from the bus terminal with the wheelchair as he could, there was bound to be a lot of zombies there, since it was a place a lot of people would have met their end. And so he sprinted, pushing the heavy wheelchair in front of him, now all he needed was for his shoelace to come untied or something, and his rotten luck would be perfect, or maybe explosive dhiorrea? He laughed to himself as he ran, thinking of Keith who had shit his pants in a rollercoster once, just because he had eaten like a ton of burritos on a dare.

Now Ellis could just as well have been running around town with a dinner bell. Even Nick heard it in his half dazed state, mumbling, "That better not be you, kid."

Ellis ran all he could, noticing that more and more zombies took up the pursuit of him, but he didn't let go of the wheelchair until he was trapped in an alley, and they came from both sides. "Shit, shit, shit," He whined, realizing he was out manned 100 to one. To his left he saw a broken fire escape, if he got up on the wheel chair and jumped, he might be able to get to it, and get to safety. Or maybe he would just be even more visual to any special infected, but right now he didn't think of that. He just jumped up on the wheelchair, and made a very ungraceful leap for the broken ladder, the wheelchair sliding under his footing.

Letting out a little victorious squeal he grabbed on to the ladder, and climbed up, hearing the growling zombies marching back and forth under him, trying to reach him, like a dog barking up a tree for a cat. "NICK!" Ellis yelled, "HANG IN THERE!" Stepping out on the ledge, he walked around a dead fella who had apparently camped out here on the fire escape, and had met his end there too. A metallic clank drew Ellis' attention as his boot hit something that scooted over the metal floor. He looked down and saw a large handgun, it looked more like a fucking hand cannon to him, but he figured that it just had to do, and didn't Nick use to carry one that looked a little like this? He wished he knew his guns better, but it just never interested him at all, he never cared for shooting anything, not even cans. And look at him now, firing left and right at something that used to be people, everyday people, transformed in to crazed cannibals.

Sticking the gun in his belt, he vaguely thought that it would be just his luck if he accidentally shot off his own dick. He could almost hear Keith laugh. Wait that wasn't something he imagined, that laugh was real. Ellis' eyes widened, that could only mean one thing! Those face humping bastards. He scanned the ground beneath him, but he couldn't see the little disgusting hunchback anywhere. Suddenly it leapt for him, missing it's attack, Ellis just jumping back screaming like a girl, or at least that is what it sounded in his own ears. Quicker than he thought he was able to, he pulled the handgun and shot at the Jockey, hitting it in the head several times before it gave up trying to force the railing, and fell dead to the ground.

Ellis looked down at the gun in his hand, "I gotta get me one of them guns, man." he laughed softly to himself. He stuck it back in his belt and picked up the rifle. Sure the gunshots had alerted more unwanted guests.

It was almost morning when the shuffling mass of carnivores under Ellis' feet started to thin out. Ellis looked at the sun in the horizon, he used to love the sunrise, but lately he had come to hate it, maybe they saw the zombies faster in the daylight, but they sure as shit saw them faster too. He just hoped that Nick was alright, he hadn't heard any screaming, so he supposed that they had not found the corner where he left the other man.

Ellis descended the ladder a little more graceful than he had gotten up, and quickly shot the couple of zombies still lingering. He grabbed the wheelchair and started running again, "God?" He panted, as he ran as fast as he could with the heavy squeaky wheelchair, "I promise you that if.." He had to stop talking because he was running out of breath, "If i make it, i will kiss him.." He wheezed. Ellis leered like an idiot as he had finally made his mind up. This was the end of the goddamn world, so he might as well take what he wanted, he who had always been so cautious, always playing it safe. No more! Nick could be as mad as he wanted, what was the worst that could happen? That he yelled profanities at him?

As the Wheelchair stopped, so did the loud obnoxious squeaking of the wheels. Ellis turned and shoot the nearest zombies before he darted into a house, knowing he could make it out of the first store bedroom window, unto a dumpster, and down to Nick.

Nick looked up as he saw movement in the window above him, and he smiled happily and tired as he saw the stupid kid waving at him, before he jumped down on the dumpster lid. Now he had expected Ellis to say something like he always did, but for once he was silent. "E-Ellis?" Nick asked, feeling slightly disturbed that he didn't just chatter away about shit no one cared about.

Ellis took a deep breath, and even took off his cap before he placed a hand on each side of Nick's head, and kissed him, even Ellis found it hard to believe that he was actually kissing Nick, till he felt the soft texture of the other man's lips against his.


	4. Chapter 4

SOTTO VOCE 4.

But keep your eyes on the road and put blinders on

You know you have to keep going now

Wake up to a new day

A dark, but white day

Make a choice

Don't wait even a second

Don't sleep even an hour

Don't have doubts, just do it

-Siri Nielsen.

Chapter 4 - Of course it stings a bit.

No one had been more surprised than Ellis when Nick didn't push him away, but grabbed his shirt and pulled him closer, deepening the kiss. As the kiss ended Ellis didn't move, he just rested his forehead against Nick's.

"What the hell was that for?" Nick whispered.

Ellis sighed but didn't answer, he had no answer to give. How could he tell Nick about the deal he had made with God on his way here? Ellis was sure that the older man would laugh at him anyway.

Nick grinned, "All bets are off i suppose."

Ellis sat back on his heels, and stared at Nick. He had not expected that answer. "Yeah I suppose." He agreed slowly. "Lets get you to the wheelchair." Ellis said with a little smile, trying to size up Nick, figuring out how to carry him best.

Nick nodded, watching Ellis as he stood up and strapped the AK, Swinging it around so it was resting against his stomach. Kneeling down with his back to Nick, "Let's go."

Nick wrapped his arms around Ellis' neck and winched as Ellis fought to get to his feet with the extra weight. "This is stupid." Nick growled, not knowing what else to say.

"Not at all." Ellis panted as he slowly, very slowly made his way out the alley. "We're gonna be fine."

Amazingly they made it to the wheelchair without rousing attention from any zombies, Ellis let himself fall backwards with Nick, landing himself on Nick's lap in the wheelchair. "Dear lord." He panted, "You're heavy."

Nick still held on to Ellis for dear life, even if he once more was seated. "I promise to diet if we get out of here alive." He chuckled out of breath.

"I will hold you to that one." Ellis answered with badly hidden sarcasm, knowing they both were skin and bones from eating nothing but canned food, and spending most their time running from death. "You can let go now." Ellis whispered.

Nick slowly let go of his death grip around Ellis' neck. "Sorry." He mumbled.

Ellis stood and handed Nick the AK, he kept the handgun himself, just for safety. "Okay we don't have a whole lot of ammo, and you gotta chose what to shoot, okay?"

"Dude," Nick grinned as he weighed the AK in his hands, "I never thought i got to ride shotgun." He looked up at Ellis with a little smile, "Technically it's not a shotgun, but who cares?"

Ellis shook his head amused and walked around the wheelchair and took a firm grip of the handles. "Here we go." He sighed before he put all his might into pushing the wheelchair. The metal screeched in protest as the wheels were set into motion again.

Nick held the AK so tight he thought he might break it, and Ellis ran for dear life, panting, gasping for breath. They knew that if they stopped they'd be dead, a larger group of zombies had gathered in pursuit of them, but lucky for them they were some slow fuckers.

Nick was beginning to think they might make it to the bridge over the river. He could see the tower coming closer in the horizon, it wouldn't be long before they were there. He was greatly concerned by the pained wheezing he could hear behind him as Ellis ran far longer and faster than he was capable of, and he did feel slightly guilty for putting them in this situation at all.

They turned a corner only to find the street packed with zombies. "Shit." Nick groaned, lifting the rifle. In the distance he could tell there was a shape that acted differently from the other aimless zombies, and then he heard the growl. He aimed at the hunter hoping he could even aim as Ellis shook the entire wheelchair.

Ellis saw the hunter too, he would call out to Nick to kill it, but found he had no air to find his voice. So instead he just focused on running and hoped he wouldn't pass out before they made it to a safe room.

Nick shot and missed. He shot again and missed again. "Bitch!" He growled, and aimed again, but this time the hunter was too close and even if he tried to get it as it jumped, and the full horror of it didn't hit him before he heard Ellis scream behind him. "Get it off, get it off, get it off! Getitoffgetitoff!"

Nick grid his teeth and tried to turn the wheelchair but the wheels were too tight for him to turn with his tired arms. So with a giant effort he turned in his seat, rewarding him with a very awkward position and a even more awkward aim at the hunter on top of Ellis. He took the shot none the less, The hunter yelped but didn't let go of it's prey. Nick shot again, and this time the hunter let go of Ellis to see what the hell was causing it pain. It turned to Nick and sneered, flashing rows of sharp yellow teeth.

Nick pulled the trigger, but the rifle just clicked, out of bullets. "Go figure." Nick groaned, and instead tossed the AK at the hunter.

Ellis got to his feet behind them, winching in pain, getting out the handgun and with a shaky hand pulled the trigger, taking out the hunter just inches from Nick. Wordlessly Ellis got to his feet, looking over his shoulder at the incoming horde, and then limped over to the wheelchair, handing Nick the gun, and Nick just took it without a word. Ellis leaned in and whispered in Nick's ear."Don't give up yet."

They had fought a feverish, crazy fight to get over that bridge, only good thing about that wheelchair was that they could hold much more ammo and bombs than they could carry. There had been moments where Nick had been sure they would die, like when the wheelchair tilted and he fell down into a crack in the bridge. Or when those big fucking tank things threw concrete after them. And as Ellis had carried him aboard the chopper, Nick did something he had not done in years, he wept. He wrapped his arms around Ellis and cried so hard his entire body shook. And maybe Ellis had wanted to cry too, but he didn't, he would just hold Nick and let him cry. Nick cried for his lost life, he cried for all the things he had wanted to do but never got around to, but he also cried happy tears of the shock of still being alive. He had not even dared think that he would survive.

Ellis let him go for a moment and went over to the medikit on the floor of the chopper, he looked through it and found what he needed, he screwed the lid off a glass with pills and handed one to Nick. "Here, that will make you feel better." He said softly.

Nick took it with a shaking hand, and swallowed it dutifully. Just two months ago he would never ever had eaten anything some grease monkey had handed him, and even less a pill. But he trusted Ellis with his life, why not trust him with meds?

Ellis watched as Nick fell asleep, he followed as the chopper landed and Nick was carried out, but that was when his journey ended, he was not allowed to go with Nick inside. Ellis had to be tested for the Green Flu and any mutation of it before he was let inside. IT made sense, but still he was sad to see the doors close and he lost sight of Nick.

Pain was what woke Nick, he groaned in discomfort, and then as the pain intensified he whimpered, opening his eyes. Last he remembered he was in the helicopter with Ellis, with a sting of regret he recalled bawling like a baby, most undignified. It took a while before he registered where the pain came from, it was his right leg that hurt like someone had set it on fire, Blinking he tried to make sense of his surroundings. White and sterile, so he could only assume he was at a hospital or somewhere that had that function. Pain shot up his side as he moved ever so slightly, causing him to scream even if he didn't want to.

The scream alerted a nurse who came through the glass door with a professional smile on her lips. "Good morning Nicholas." She said, "Finally decided to wake, did you?"

Nick was baffled, what the hell was she talking about, he ran a hand over his chin, finding not stubbles but an actual beard under his fingers. "How.." He croaked out with a hoarse voice.

"You've been out cold in two months." She said, meddling with a syringe. When she noticed the slightly panic stricken expression on Nick's face she just smiled, "Don't worry this is just a mild painkiller."

Nick had no choice than to believe her,

He had been on the verge of sleep again as the door had opened again. Nick blinked, staring at Ellis that looked very different in a pair of jeans and a too big shirt. Something was off, and then he realised that his companion didn't wear a hat, he had never seen Ellis without that stupid hat.

"Nick." Ellis sighed happily, "How are you?" He asked carefully as he slowly sat down next to the hospital bed.

"Where are we?" Nick asked, knowing that it was not related to the question at all.

"You're never gonna believe this." Ellis laughed, "But they evacuated everyone as far away from the coast of the US as they could think of." He paused, "We're at the island of Banoi. Other than that i don't know where the hell we're at," Ellis smiled, "It got jungle and everything, Oh Nick." He took Nicks hand, "I can't wait to show you this place once you're up and running." Nick looked beaten. And Ellis knew why, so he just continued, "The doctor told me that you hadn't damaged your spine, you fractured your hip badly, On the plus side it means that you'll walk again, on the down side... " He paused again, searching for the right words, feeling Nick's hold on his hand growing painfully hard. "You'll have a stiff leg because they had to use all sorts of metal to repair the bone."

Nick didn't really know what to do with that information at all. So he just let out a breath he had been holding, releasing Ellis' hand a little.

"Did you hear that? You're gonna walk again!" Ellis grinned.

"With a cane, like a retard?" Nick just asked flatly.

"Yeah maybe. But we can get you a cool-ass cane!" Ellis admitted, and then boldly raised Nick's hand to his lips, kissing it gently. "I'm just so glad you're gonna walk again, you scared me for a moment there."

Nick looked at Ellis, searching his eyes for something he thought he had seen back there in the alley. He untangled his hand from Ellis, But instead of snatching it back, he caressed the younger man's cheek, "You saved me." Nick whispered.

"That's what friends are for." Ellis just whispered breathlessly, as Nick's fingers ghosted across his face.

"Does that deal of yours with God still apply?" Nick asked with a tiny smile.

"What do you mean?" Ellis asked confused.

Nick grabbed a hold of Ellis' neck and pulled the man down till their noses touched. "I was just wondering if you only kissed people when you made deals with your invisible friends."

Ellis just smiled, "I suppose i can make an exception." When Nick didn't answer, Ellis just turned his head slightly so their lips met. A kiss much less desperate than last, And a kiss they both were reluctant to end.

Nick started to laugh softly as Ellis blushed sightly. "Well, at least that i didn't damage that part."

Ellis snickered too as Nick's erection was clearly visible through the flimsy hospital cover. Ellis was just about to say something when the light went out with a sickening pop, He looked at Nick in the dark. "It's probably just a fusebox." He said. But as screams emerged from the dark, the generator kicked in. Nick sucked in his breath as he saw the nurse that had given him the injection sprint past the open door in panic.

Nick looked at Ellis, and Ellis looked at Nick, and without a word Ellis got up to find something for Nick to use as a cane. He found a crutch in the cabinet in the corner, for a moment he just stood and stared at it, his back to Nick. "Yanno." He said softly. "Don't give up, we'll make it, we just have to." He turned around and smiled a tired smile at Nick. "Are you with me?"

Nick fought to slide out of bed and rest his feet on the floor. "Like Siamese twins." Nick answered, holding out his hand for the crutch.

They both knew the likelihood of them both surviving this was very low, but at least they knew where they had each other, realising that trust was more crucial than any other weapon.

-The End.


End file.
